I Gladly Resign

I have been so convicted of late about how my pride is interfering with my walk with Christ. I feel like I have something to offer Him, and I constantly have to remind myself that I am nothing before I can fully realize that He is everything. Like when I dance, I want to take the lead. I constantly have to remind myself to let the guy leading me take the lead. I could say something cheesy and clichè, like "Life is a dance; let God be your leader", but that's too light to say about something as serious as a baby Christian's walk with Christ.

A dear lady from a church we had been attending sent me a little booklet entitled, "Looking Unto Jesus". Here are a few quotes from it that really struck a chord with me:

"We look unto Jesus to receive from Him the task and the cross for each day, with the grace which is sufficient to carry the cross and to accomplish the task; the grace that enables us to be patient with His patience, active with His activity, loving with His love; never asking "What am I able for?" but rather: "What is He not able for?" and waiting for His strength which is made perfect in our weakness.

We look unto to Jesus to go forth from ourselves and to forget ourselves; so that our darkness may flee away before the brightness of His face; so that our joys may be holy, and our sorrow restrained; that He may cast us down, and that He may raise us up; that He may afflict us, and that He may comfort us; that He may despoil us, and that He may enrich us; that He may teach us to pray, and that He may answer our prayers; that while leaving us in the world, He may separate us from it, our life being hidden with Him in God, and our behavior bearing witness to Him before men."

Did you see the part where it said "...waiting for His strength which is made PERFECT in our WEAKNESS"? Christ's strength, immeasurable, unchanging strength, is made absolutely perfect in our weakness. I don't know about you, but I sure am weak. As much as my pride hates to admit it, I am. I doubt. I fear. I'm anxious. I worry. But, I also wait for His strength which is made perfect in my weakness. 

Look at the second paragraph. See all that? All of that.... I really don't know what to say. I think it says it perfectly itself. The last part of that last sentence of the second paragraph really scares me, though. Is my behavior bearing witness to Him before men? I am smack-dab in the middle of four brothers. I am the only girl at home. I have quite a bit of trouble trying not to boss my little (and older...) brothers around. Is that behavior bearing witness to Christ before my brothers? No. 

I want to share with you a hymn that is especially close to me as I struggle with pride that doesn't want to let me go. 

"Nearer, still nearer, close to Thy heart,

Draw, me my Savior, so precious Thou art;

Fold me, O fold me close to Thy breast,

Shelter me safe in that 'Haven of Rest'.

Nearer, still nearer, nothing I bring,

Nought as an offering to Jesus my King;

Only my sinful, now contrite heart;

Grant me the cleansing Thy blood doth impart.

Nearer, still nearer, Lord, to be Thine,

Sin, with its follies, I gladly resign,

All of its pleasures, pomp and its pride:

Give me but Jesus, my Lord crucified.

Nearer, still nearer, while life shall last,

Till all its struggles and trials are past;

Then through eternity, ever I'll be

Nearer, my Savior, still nearer to Thee."

-Leila Morris-

That second, third, and fourth verse especially. "Sin, with its follies, I gladly resign." "...nothing I bring, nought as an offering to Jesus my King."

My pride would love to say I have a lot to offer God. But when I look at myself, I have nothing to bring as an offering to my King. 

"Give me but Jesus, my Lord crucified."

If I do nothing in this world, but have Jesus, my life was not in vain. And when this feeble frame of mine breathes its last and I enter into that Haven of Rest for ETERNITY, my mind can't even grasp this, "ever I'll be nearer, my Savior, still nearer to Thee."

Kaelan 

"May His beauty rest upon me

As I seek the lost to win,

And may they forget the channel, 

Seeing only Him."

-Katie Wilkinson-